NTA

Hi crafties,

trigger warning, this post is a bit personal. I haven’t posted a lot in social media because I’m aware some people are reading this – and those people have choosen not to be a part of my life anymore. I was like „I don’t want them to hear a single word from me or my family after this shit show“ – but this way they are taking away a thing from me I really love. Doodling, beeing creative, card making and beeing a little weirdo in public. So no more eggshells. I’ll stomp my way back to this stuff, just because I love it.

I suffer from PTBS and Depression. It’s not a big secret to my peers. I’m doing fine btw. Well kind of, most days. If you know me a bit, you’ll know that I gone through lots of shit. And by writing this down I will change nothing to the people who aren’t part of my life anymore. So here is a big f*** you for blaming me for stuff I can’t change, for your lack of emphathy or your privilege that makes you blind to people who aren’t quite like you.

So, this said – I’m back. New old me with not so much free time on my hands but love in my heart for all of you. And if you are suffering from a mental illness or something else – you are a fucking little wonder and you are precious.

I learned almost everything the hard way and I’m still learning. I try to be better, nicer, kinder.

Last week a mother I knew a bit, almost cried, cause we finally met again at the playground. She knows I’m the only mother around playing with all the children, including everyone and got enough toys for everyone around. I don’t mind if I look goofy playing with my daughter and her little friends, baking little sand cakes. She said I made her son smile for the first time in ages. The other kids don’t want to play with him. Why? They are toddlers, for fucks sake! Another Mom I met was almost losing her shit cause she doesn’t know how to handle everything right now and everyone else is like „I’m fine, I’m soooo fine, this ist great.“ No. No, it’s not. I checked – nothing is.

We all struggle. We all have problems. We all are so fucking stupid. We all are afraid. We lie about our feelings. But please be kind and try to be better.

So, after this rant you really, really, really deserve a new digi stamp! Enjoy your little chubby unicorn with his list.

Don’t forget, you are a legend and enough.

Jessa